• Desiree Montesano

Rainbow Baby

Updated: Feb 18

As long as I can remember I wanted to be a mother. I would go on dates and tell the guy right away so that they would understand that’s what I wanted out of life. As you can see it didn’t scare my husband away. After we got married August 2015 we “tried” on our honeymoon. When I say try I just mean we didn’t prevent it. In April 2016 we got pregnant. We were so excited we were ready to start the next chapter of our lives and we also had no idea what to do next. Before I could make it to that 8 week appointment I lost the first baby at around 6 weeks.

I have always been a positive person. I tried so hard for this miscarriage to not mess with me mentally and physically I kicked it up at the gym. We didn’t tell anyone about the loss until after, because we didn’t tell them we were pregnant. Months went by and we didn’t get pregnant again until December. Staying very hopeful that entire time remembering how it felt back in April we didn’t share the news with anyone. This baby was 8 weeks when we lost it. The week of the Dr appointment it was hard to call and cancel that one. I was so excited to hopefully tell the family at Christmas. Instead I drank a ton of champagne and hid the feelings of this loss.

A woman going through miscarriages or infertility are extremely fragile. The topic isn’t spoken about enough and it’s hard. I can’t relate to someone who went through IVF, but I can support them. Sharing stories and helping loved ones and friends is the best we can do. No one knows your feelings, or your thoughts but it actually helps to talk about them.

January 2017 we got pregnant with our beautiful Eleanor Rose. I loved being pregnant, maybe because I wanted a baby so bad or maybe because I felt so good. We didn’t tell our family until 14 weeks. It was so hard keeping a secret that I wanted to shout from the rooftops. Eleanor is my rainbow baby. Every journal entry I wrote while I was pregnant and even still I write how grateful I am to be her mom. If you are a parent it’s not always easy. For me, being more humble by being able to have the beautiful gift of life makes me be a better mom. It gives me more patience, more love, more understanding as to what my child needs. I think in life you can have it all. With my family I do ❤️

If you need to talk or want to reach out with questions I’m here. I love sharing and helping and giving as much advice as I can. Stay strong and don’t give up!

Book recommendation below 👍🏻

Emotionally Intelligent Parenting: How to Raise a Self-Disciplined, Responsible, Socially Skilled Child https://www.amazon.com/dp/0609804839/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_OJ8xDb7HVD6H9


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