• Desiree Montesano

Molding a child now, for later...

As Eleanor grows and her mind is developing, I'm trying so hard to be mindful of all my/our actions. Most of my stories on Instagram are when she's sleeping, unless of course we are doing fun stuff and I'm making her cheese for her followers.. Yes she is 1 1/2 still taking 2 naps a day. It works for us!

Everyday I try to implement the same core values that I think are so import in raising a tiny person. By no means do I have it all figured out, but It stinks to hear some moms say they don't bring their kids out as much as we do. Or their child doesn't talk as much as Eleanor or they compare her activity levels and strength. I don't compare her to any kid. She is a spitfire all on her own, and some kids are quite. We try to socialize her at least 3 times per week. Her little gym, library classes, playdates, jump park etc. Being a stay at home mom my struggle is to make sure I'm teaching her enough. Manners, Colors, Shapes, Alphabet etc. Is she active enough?

So regardless if your child is home, or daycare it's so much more than those basic skills. It always brings me back to rituals and routines. In my opinion, having a strict schedule is just as bad as no schedule. I always use the term "a structured mess" In so many aspects of my life. A few weeks back, I attended an awesome symposium at the local JCC and it hit on so many topics to make you feel good about what we are doing great on as parents. Also, to inspire and give us tips and tools for where you want to improve as parents.

BTW this is a judgement free zone, I don't share these things to be a know it all, 100% out of love and to help in any way I can.

Thought I'd share some tips and tools that may help you along this parenting journey!

(these tips I learned through research and the local JCC I just made them my own)


Communication is key to making our children feel secure, loved, and valued. Talking and listening to them with direct eye contact makes them know you are present.

At home tips:

-Designate phone free times

-Eat meals together

-Talk / sing together during car rides


Connecting with your child , where they feel nothing but complete trust will show them you support them. Making experiences together connects you in ways they will grow to understand the value of relationships.

At home tips:

-Teach your family history

-Do activities and capture memories in photographs

-Swin lessons

-Spend alone time with your little one

-Laugh a lot


Inspiring your child with good core values will help them with self awareness. Teaching positive life skills to create a dynamic of uplifting positivity in the home.

At home tips:

-Model good behavior and manners

-Empower your little one to make a difference

-Give them compliments and positive reinforcement

-Teach them that caring for your body is a valuable life skill

through good sleep, exercise and nutrition


Teaching different types of traditions will help your child respect diversity and promote a peaceful environment (school, work, home)

At home tips:

-Daily, Weekly, Monthly, Yearly family traditions

-Celebrate holidays

-Share old family traditions, make new ones

-Show appreciation to why your celebrating


Showing your child teamwork will help them grow individually and be able to play well with others. Building their self-esteem and empowering them with confidence will help them with their social skills.

At home tips:

-Assign chores and responsibilities

-Discipline and consequences of good and bad behavior

-Participate and volunteer in the community

I hope this post finds you well. I'm trying to instill these tips, advice in our everyday life for a few reasons. One being I don't want to raise a little asshole!! Another being that now a days the sense of entitlement is way to pronounced in this generation. I grew up on the old fashioned side, and I think I'm a better person for it. I'm not oblivious to the world we live in and will raise my child with technology/ information. That being said by teaching her these core values will hopefully make for a hard working, honest, driven, kind human being.

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